When I’m feeling depressed, the only energy I can muster up is used in eating infrequent meals, sleeping, maybe going on a short walk around my street, perhaps watching a non-heart-wrenching movie, and being on my computer. Even on my computer, about all I can do is obsessively check my Facebook page and e-mail inbox to see if anyone’s sent me anything. It’s rare if someone does, which adds its contribution to the depression I’m already feeling. I’m on three medications, PLUS birth control (for my hormones)…THIS SHOULD NOT BE HAPPENING. Part of this might be due to a friend from way back contacting me last night and telling me every depressing thing that has happened to him in the past three years. He said getting it all out really helped him…I’m glad. But I think it REALLY depressed me…because, I don’t know…he’s been stuck in a depressive rut for so long…not the sort of story that lifts my hopes when I’m feeling down (which I was last night, too, albeit to a lesser degree). I can’t complain to him that what he told me really depressed me, so instead, I’ll just sit by, ignore him, and wait to feel better. Lawd. Life is difficult.
So, I haven’t blogged in quite a while. Things have been a little crazy good and crazy bad since I’ve last written. I guess things have been good enough that I haven’t needed the solo release of writing anonymously on the Internet. The only thing I can think to say right now is that I’m really digging the Macklemore and Ryan Lewis (ft. Wanz) song, “Thrift Shop,” and its video!